Category Archives: Latest News

The latest news and updates from Joe Wooldridge. Oftentimes pertaining to new businesses in Kansas City, concerts, art fairs and more.

Web 3.0 – Preparing for and building the Semantic Web

Share Button

Web 3.0 – Preparing for and building the Semantic Web

Ready to help manifest the future of web? Get ready for Web 3.0 – The Semantic Web

In web 3.0 you will need to build your site and web applications to deliver content in a semantic, organized format. We’re seeing this progress as Google, Bing and Yahoo! have embraced the microdata formats from schema.org.

This is the future of being found on the internet for what you do. It is time to build your site for web 3.0 (the semantic web). Start now by using schema.org’s microdata wherever and whenever possible.

Kate Ray provides this great video re: web 3.0 w/ transcript, interview bios, etc. Need info on building a site or incorporating semantic web elements into your organic SEO strategies? Contact Joe Wooldridge at joe@joewooldridge.com and stay tuned to www.joewooldridge.com.

Web 3.0 Interviews with:

  1. Tim Berners-Lee
  2. Clay Shirky
  3. Chris Dixon
  4. David Weinberger
  5. Nova Spivack
  6. Jason Shellen
  7. Lee Feigenbaum
  8. John Hebeler
  9. Alon Halevy
  10. David Karger
  11. Abraham Bernstein

Joe Wooldridge is a digital marketing generalist, currently working on www.myjoecard.com.

via Web 3.0 on Vimeo.

Share Button

Erato’s Return (New Poem from October 12, 2011)

Share Button

desert-museA dream she flew
Westward with new heaven on the rise
Eyes providing sparkle for infinite grains
Gifting beauty to the desert lands
Goodbye to the living lies
This elegance tarries no longer
Freedom calls her back
It’s time to weave new dreams

Joseph Wooldridge
Wednesday, October 12th, 2011 @3:44am.
for Joan Severance

Share Button

Yes, Let’s Go! (New Poem from October 3, 2011)

Share Button

Allons ‘y

Frolicking in newness, wavesWhat will we do here at the end of the World
Where the water splashes
The gulls cry and memories wash through?
To sing, smile and cry along . . .
Yes, let’s go.

New Worlds await with new songs, laughter,
Love, loss, pain and ecstasy.
Bring on the new barrage
Let it relieve the nagging of the past.
Yes, let’s go.

Dashing into the waves
Running like valiant steeds
Break again and again
Collision, immersion, thrown back on the beach.
Yes, let’s go.

Joseph Wooldridge
Wednesday, September 21st, 2011 @1:55am.

Share Button

The Eternal King (a short story)

Share Button

*// Author’s Note: Story originally penned in late January, 1994. //*

Jack sat in the blue plastic chair, one of a long row of ugly, uncomfortable, blue plastic The comfort of the blue plastic chairchairs. Occasionally, Jack squirmed in the chair in an effort to make himself a little more comfortable, as his eyes strained at the video screen.

“Shit, shit, and more shit.” Jack said, switching through the channels.

After checking his watch, Jack realized that his lunch break was nearing an end. Jack stood up, clicked off the television, and exited Gate 99, on his way back to the Purgatory Judgment Omniplex, Jack stopped into the men’s room to have a smoke. Jack looked at his reflection framed with the curling cigarette smoke, and he still could not get over it.

“I guess I look pretty good, don’t I,” said Jack, smiling at his reflection, “not bad for being dead.”

Jack further studied his reflection. He really enjoyed the fact that the scar on his face was gone, one of the only things that he considered to be good about the afterlife, no blemishes. Noticing the scruff on his face, Jack grabbed the wall-mounted electric razor, and began to shave. The razor was a Norelco 950. How Norelco got the contract to supply razors here was a mystery to Jack, but here they were nonetheless. Checking his watch again, Jack finished shaving, put out his cigarette and left the restroom.

The majority of the residents of Purgatory worked in the judgment division, as did Jack, Work consisted of sitting in a small office cubicle, about the size afforded to temps at large firms, and scrolling via computer monitor through both the good deeds and the sins of those individuals who appeared close to the borderline of going to the bad place. Once familiar with the good and bad elements of each individual’s case, each ‘judge’ is to offer his judgment on the matter with supporting argument, and include a proposed judgment.

As a rule of thumb, people were given the benefit of the doubt, although no one was allowed to pass judgment on their friends or loved ones, thus preventing preferential treatment.


Jack arrived at his cubicle, slid his “Purgatory Express” card through the time creditor, and resumed his work. The work wasn’t without its rewards. Jack was often touched by good deeds, as he was both Intrigued and disgusted by the bad ones. During the first few months on the job, Jack was continually surprised by the things that people do. The sex and violence that he saw at his job made the stuff on television lame by comparison.

Another perk to working in the judgment division was that they were afforded to peek into the near futures of each individual, so that their judgment files would he ready if they died unexpectedly. Initially, this confused Jack, because he did not understand how something unexpected could happen if they could already see into the future. After a chat with his supervisor, Jack figured out that there was a basic plan for Earthly events, but that sometimes they are altered for various reasons. After work, Jack went down to the entertainment district. The neon sign above the nightclub read “ALEXANDER’S BABYLONIAN BAR & GRILL” Alexander’s was Jack’s favorite haunt, as he often met his co-workers there to relax, enjoy a drink, and discuss their day’s caseload.

Although it had been nearly two years that Jack had spent in purgatory, he was reminded of his death every time he entered Alexander’s.

Jack joined the crowd that was entering the bar, as he had done many times before. Just inside the entrance were three teller machines. Jack reached into his wallet, pulled out his Purgatory Express card, and inserted it into the machine.

The Purgatory Express Card

The Purgatory Express card enabled the user to check the status of their account, credit it, or charge something to it. Rather than having a monetary balance in one’s account, the account that Purgatory Express offers deals with the length of one’s stay. As each day goes by, one day is subtracted from each individual’s account. When a person finally reaches an even balance, they are issued a ticket on the next flight out. The problem that many run into is the fact that each time the person indulges in an earthly vice, their stay in purgatory is prolonged. For example, a pack of cigarettes or cover charge at Alexander’s will extend one’s visit for another day.

The teller machine notified Jack that he still had accommodations in Purgatory for another 287 days. After making two more entries, the total went up to 289 days. The machine then dispensed one pack of Marlboro cigarettes and a rainbow-colored arm band. He finished his transaction, frowned at the new total, and retrieved his card.

Jack put on the arm band, put his wallet back in his pocket, and went straight to the bar. Jack winced as he glanced over at Elvis on the stage, crooning “Love Me Tender” as he had done on a hundred nights before. He had previously been the house act at a different establishment in the entertainment district, but had gotten kicked out after getting drunk and shooting all of the television sets. Somehow he had worked out a permanent gig at Alexander’s, sans pistol. Every night that he came in there and saw Elvis made him further inclined to frequent a different club.

“Hi Jack, how are you?”

“Just lovely Ray,” said Jack, “scotch and water, please.”

“You sure you don’t want to try our shot, the Nancy Kerrigan Knee Slammer?” said Ray.

“No thanks, just a scotch and water,”

Dallas Morning NewsIn addition to the drink, Jack bought a copy of the Dallas Morning News so as to keep up with events in his old hometown. The Dallas Cowboys had just won their second Super Bowl In a row, and he had not been there to see either one of them. Jack’s thoughts wandered back to the night of his death. The memory was fuzzy. He had been at a sports bar watching a Cowboys game. Jack remembered being pissed off because the cowboys had lost, and he had lost a lot of money betting on the game. In an effort to soothe his mood, Jack decided to have a few more drinks. After leaving the bar, Jack sensed that he was heavily intoxicated. His vision was poor, and his reflexes were very poor. The road became treacherous, and Jack didn’t remember much more, except that it was hard to stay on the road.

“Fucking drunk drivers, huh, Ray?”

“Yeah Jack, whatever,” Ray said. “Need another?”

“Sure.”

~*~

After not making the curve, Jack remembered being jostled around, then darkness, then waking up in a crowded passenger airliner.

“Can I get you something to drink, sir?” asked the stewardess. “What?” said Jack.

“Would you like a drink?” repeated the stewardess. “What the fuck is this, and where the hell am I at?” asked Jack. “Not in Hell, sir,” said the stewardess. “Perhaps you should read your pamphlet, it may explain things.”

Jack looked down at the silver and blue pamphlet in his lap, it was entitled: Purgatory: Living in the Hereafter. Checking his surroundings, Jack realized that he was dressed for the occasion; He was dressed in a regal black tuxedo, with a blue cummerbund and tails. Looking through his pockets, Jack found his wallet, his engraved Zippo lighter, and a new pack of cigarettes. Jack would have felt extremely dapper considering his attire, but the few handfuls of dirt that had been thrown on him ruined the effect.

Jack brushed at the dirt on his sleeves, pocketed the pamphlet, and ordered coffee. The plane arrived at Purgatory International Airport soon after he had finished his second cup. As Jack and the others filed off the plane and into the jetway, a flight attendant greeted each person with a friendly smile and a handbill.

“Welcome to Purgatory, we hope your stay is enlightening.”

Alexander's Babylonian Bar & Grill

Jack paused for a moment, looked at the flier, and then decided to move along. The flier was for a free evening at “ALEXANDER’S BABYLONIAN BAR AND GRILL.” Jack pocketed the coupon, lit up a smoke, and headed off in the direction of the bar.

~*~

Jack got his drink, and proceeded to the table where a few of his co­workers were gathered, and sat down in the seat that his friend had saved for him. Jack noticed that his friend was looking troubled.

“What can I do for you, Stan?” asked Jack.

“Jack, I’ve got some bad news for you.” said Stan. “It’s about your brother.”

Jack and Stan had an arrangement that they would do their best to keep each other informed about the lives of their respective family and friends. Although such an arrangement was against the rules, many people shared the information anyway.

“What’s the deal, has he gotten himself in trouble again?”

“Big trouble,” said Stan. “I’ve got to give a final review on him, because he will be dead in two days.”

Jack stared into his drink as he digested the news. Of his entire family, he was mainly concerned with his younger brother, Marc. Jack felt bad that Marc was going to die, but it seemed to him that it would be nice to see his brother again.

“Do you know which flight he’s coming in on?”

“That’s the bad part, Jack.” said Ray. “It doesn’t look like he’ll be coming here.”

~*~

Somehow Jack convinced Stan to show him the file on his brother. Currently, his brother was on track for an extended vacation in Purgatory, but the glimpse of the next two days revealed that his brother was to be shot to death by a police officer. Apparently, the officer had witnessed him committing arson, and had shot him when he had refused the order to freeze.

By researching the file, Jack learned that his brother had set fire to his warehouse property in the downtown district in order to collect the insurance money. However, unbeknownst to Marc, there were a group of five homeless people who had been living in the back of the warehouse, who were to perish in the fire. It was the incidental deaths which were to weigh heavily against Marc.

“Stan, there has to be something we can do. He had no idea that those people were in there.”

“Jack, I can’t interfere because I am one of the ones judging his file, and you can’t go and save his life because he is your brother, and they will find out how you obtained access to his file, and we’ll both be in very deep shit.”

“Look, help me get down there somehow. You’ve been here for a long time, and if anybody knows how to pull this off, I’m sure you would know who it is.” said Jack.

“Hold on, Jack. You don’t want to mess with this. There is a great penalty for messing with the given plan. Besides, there is a slim chance that he will be given the benefit of the doubt in this.” said Stan.

“It’s worth it to me, Stan.’ said Jack. “I’ll take the chance, and whatever punishment, because I know I could never be happy if he were condemned to such a horrible existence.”

“I’ll try to help you, Jack. I really will. You’ve just got to understand that you can’t directly influence with your brother’s fate, and that it is 99.9% likely that you will be found out. You know that the Big Guy very rarely misses things.”

~*~

Closing time at Alexander’s found Stan and Jack at the back of the bar. The other patrons had left, and Ray was locking up, and turning out the lights. Elvis stretched out a couch on the back wall with a bottle of Kentucky Gentleman and a peanut-butter sandwich.

Stan had explained the situation to Ray, who had sent note to Alexander himself to explain the situation, and Jack’s request.

Ray finished up, went to the back room, and returned a short while later.

“Alexander will see you now.” said Ray.

Ray led them through the back room, down a few flights of stairs, and finally into a dim smoky office. Jack was surprised to find that this was THE Alexander – Alexander the Great – whom was now seated with his feet on his desk, chomping on a Cuban cigar. He did not appear to be much older than Jack, yet had existed over two thousand years longer.Alexander The Great In Battle

“Welcome,” he said, “How do you like the place?”

Jack and Stan stood in amazement, unable to speak. Finally, Jack found the words with which to explain the nature of his request,

“Surely you are able to do this, considering that the supplies for your establishment come from Earth.” said Jack.

Alexander laughed for a moment, “What is it worth to you?”

“I’ll do anything you ask, just get me there.” replied Jack.

“If I grant you this boon, then you must stay here and work for me for the next 1,000 years, or until Armageddon, Whichever comes first. Agreed?”

“Fine” said Jack.

“Although it’s not as easy as it once was,” said Alexander. “I used to enjoy greater freedom to return to Earth for supplies for my establishment. But recently they have become more strict even with me about who may make the trip in order to restock the shelves.”

“What does all this mean?” replied Jack,

“It means,” said Alexander, “that the only person I can send for supplies these days is Elvis!”

~*~

Jack ducked as he boarded the Earth-bound flight. Everything looked funny through his thick rose-colored sunglasses, and he felt like the world’s biggest asshole wearing that white sequined jumpsuit, and those fake pork-chop sideburns. The plane landed in Las Vegas of all places, where Jack caught a connecting flight to Dallas.Elvis Presley - There's A Reason People Keep Seeing Him Everywhere

According to instructions, he was to go nowhere near his brother, much less anyone else that he knew.

The flight landed in Dallas, and Jack exited the flight. The plane ride had been bad enough, what with the people craning their necks, and the old lady sitting next to him who happened to be a big Elvis fan, but the people in the Dallas airport snickered and laughed as he strode by. Although he didn’t like being the recipient of so much attention, he realized that there was one good thing about his costume; he had no problem getting a cab.

Jack arrived at the warehouse with little time to spare. Soon enough he found the door that the homeless people had forced open. When he found them in the back, he understood why they had been unable to get out. All five homeless men were passed out in their respective comforts, with their favorite bottles of cheap wine held close to their bodies. For a moment, Jack figured that they might be better off dead, and then he commenced dragging them out of the place one at a time.

As soon as he had dragged the last one out, Jack ran from the building in the opposite direction to where he had instructed the cab driver to wait. As badly as he wanted to go to warn his brother, he realized that it was too late as he saw the flames licking skyward from the far side of the warehouse.

The shots that he heard sounded distant, and he heard no cry for help. The cab driver stared at him as he jumped in the back seat of the taxi. Jack realized he was crying, “Just drive man.”

Copyright © 1994-2012, Joseph Wooldridge

Share Button

Mention this Blog Post, Save Twenty Bucks (Keyword “Smoothride”)

Share Button

ON THE IMPORTANCE OF RELATIONSHIPS: I have learned many things since starting up the MyJoeCard network in 2003. Perhaps more than anything, I have learned to appreciate small business owners in America. My success as a small business owner depends on their success – and the lackluster economy has not been helpful or kind to small businesses across the board. Indeed the marketing and advertising industries have been in an accelerating pace of constant flux.  How people get their news and information is continually morphing – as are the ways in which small businesses are able to reach the consumer.  One of my main goals in starting MyJoeCard.Com back then was to build a network where consumers can easily shop for the things they want and need – in a ‘Go Green’ and ‘Shop Local’ format that would allow businesses to be found easily. I figured that if I can help enough people get where they are going, then I can get where I am going.

It follows that I have developed many strong, long-term relationships with Kansas City area small business owners as a consumer as well. In a world that has scores of ‘Daily Deals’, limited-time specials and coupon mailers impacting B2C industries, I have been lucky enough to have developed a relationship with an auto repair shop – and more importantly – my CAR developed a relationship with them as well.

Today’s blog post highlights the importance of finding a quality automotive repair shop (in this case, Smith Specialty Automotive) and developing a relationship with them. Instead of browsing for automotive deals at a myriad of different repair shops, I started getting to know Dave, Keith, Tom, Kellee and the rest of the crew at Smith Specialty.

I am proud to drive an older (paid for) car and I have been fortunate to realize the long-term savings and cost-benefits of having a consistently-serviced and maintained auto. Without that relationship, I think my car would have died a few years ago. These guys have taken great care of my car, have been consistent in maintaining it – and there is no doubt in my mind that quality service and maintenance by a quality auto repair shop has saved me a bundle AND extended the life of my car.  BOO-YAH!

So Dave, this post goes out to you (and Smith Specialty Automotive).

Dear reader, if you are interested in experiencing quality automotive repair on a consistent basis by highly trained and experienced professionals (and the overall cost benefits and extended life of your car), then I recommend calling Dave Smith at Smith Specialty Automotive.  His phone number is (913) 393-0700, or contact him by email: smithspecialty@sbcglobal.net.

If you mention this blog post when you take your car in for service and repair at Smith Specialty Automotive, Dave will give you a $20 ‘repeat customer’ coupon that you can use on your car’s second visit.  After two visits to Smith Specialty Automotive, I believe you will find a ‘home’ for your car – and take the mystery and guessing out of maintaining your car.

Share Button

Providence Rolling (New Poem from July 8, 2011)

Share Button

Providence Rolling

Angel exuding light
Angel exuding Glorious Light

A Golden Age is coming
For me, for you – for us.
Gone are bad things and bad ways,
Bad habits are miles back.

Can’t you hear the ringing?
In your ears – Angels singing
Praise upon praise of effervescent Glory
Coming this way now.

The future’s bright sun rises up the road
Meeting our shining eyes and bright faces
Expectant we are – as all is found
All is Saved, Heaven! This way!

Oh don’t you dare think you’re dreaming child,
It is served up here and there,
All planes and all lanes, panes and facets
Providence rolling for the World.

Joe Wooldridge
Friday, July 8th, 2011 at 3:54am.

Share Button

Midnight In Paris, A Pedantic Movie Review

Share Button
Midnight In Paris
Midnight In Paris

“Midnight In Paris”

Oh Dear Reader, I must admit that this is my first Woody Allen movie experience (at least that I am aware of).  I had no expectations other than the fact that any pretzels consumed during the movie would most likely “Make Me Thirsty”.  Now that I’m over myself, on to the review.

This movie was excellent. Taken in as all movies should be, with little or no knowledge of what lies ahead, and therefore no expectation of the movie in any way.  All I knew was:

  1. The Title,
  2. That it was a Woody Allen movie, and
  3. That Owen Wilson was in it.

Casting was A+, character development was above adequate.  Dialogue was superb.  Acting was engaging and artful.  Setting was hard to beat (Paris, France).

I’ll not be a spoiler for you.  I’ll just say that if you are well-rounded, well-read and/or well-traveled (as in Paris, France) – then you will be able to more fully appreciate all that is offered here.  Not a delight for the dullards.

If you like romance?  This is a great choice.  Grab a date.  If you’re in love, or would like to be – then go see this one.

Movie Rating: 4.5 Stars (out of five)

Rating Justification: Excellent Movie.  It wasn’t over-done.  It wasn’t lacking. It was served up masterfully.  Old Man Allen delivered a masterpiece.  I’m not sure if I am compelled to see all of his other works, or scared that they won’t measure up?  Somewhere in between, I’m thinking.

Midnight In Paris
Romance In Paris

Theater Review: Cinemark “The Palace” at the Plaza

Cinemark The Palace at The Plaza
526 Nichols Rd.
Kansas City, MO 64112

A Saturday Night Showing (10:00pm).  Parking Garage was close enough.  Good thing I didn’t get vertigo circling up to the 5th level.  No matter. Experiencing Kansas City’s Country Club Plaza on a summer night is a beautiful thing (barring any twitter ‘flash mobs’).

  • Seats: “A” for Comfort
  • Popcorn: “B-” for standard fare.
  • Crowd: “A” well behaved, no one kicking the seat. No talkers.  No milk duds hitting the screen.
  • Special Note: Warning: This movie may make you nostalgic, and also may make you want to visit or relocate to Paris, France.

Peace Out.

Joe

Share Button

Onward

Share Button

Texas-Rain-2011“Fly! Angel, Fly!”

Pulling down from the Heavens,
Drawing down from the skies,
Glorious blue orbs of Life,
Tears of the Angel to quench our thirst,
Soft bullets of peace to fill the rivers,
Passionate, cleansing curtain to wring us new.

Propelled by thunder,
Powered by lightning,
Driven by myriad winds,
Swollen armies of the battle above,
Raging to give us fresh blood,
Delivering us from yesterday.

Joe Wooldridge
June 18, 2011 3:56am

Share Button

In Transit (Poem from June 18, 2011)

Share Button

In Transit

Welcome to the future I
Just left for it yesterday
Long scrabbling, straggling scroll down Life’s hallway

How is it we know so little past the sands of Egypt?
If we’re so advanced, how come we can’t build
The Great Pyramid again even if we wanted to?

From Babel, we babble in scores
Of lashing, clashing tongues
Missing the canopy of watery heavens

Much as India is, with too many wild monkeys
In our midst – playing at being people
Not enough vimanas to go around for The Great Escape.

Joe Wooldridge
June 18, 2011 at 3:17am

Share Button

A Blog (finally)

Share Button

Wow, well I finally took the time to put up my own blog.  It is sure to be an adventure, sharing thoughts with you, dear reader.

More To Come . . . . .

Joe

Share Button